A Celebration of Bob: Last Weeks Journal
In the last weeks of Dad's life, we made an effort to update our friends and family regularly through email. Added to those updates are a few pictures. The Last Weeks Journal is this special part of Dad's life.
------------------------------
Posted Fri, 05/15/2009
Dear friends and loved ones,
Thank you so much for your prayers.
I had a rather smooth trip back to the States. Only one small
hiccup in Chicago when they needed to do some repairs before we
could fly, but it was straightened out well enough and we arrived
in Philly just about 11pm. I was blessed to go right to the
hospital to visit with Dad for a hour or so before turning in for
the night. God is so good.
Dad strength has weakened considerable over the last couple weeks.
He also has been battling pain in the belly/liver area. In
addition to chronic hiccups and they have him on Thorazine and
Morphine that helps him sleep quite a bit. Occasionally this
leaves him a little confused as he easily drifts in and out of
sleep and it seems the dreams get carried into his awake moments
(I am currently sitting next to him in the hospital and typing
between his awake moments).
It was good today that he was able to get up out of the bed to
take a few laps around the floor in a wheelchair. Dad had wanted
to show me some of the areas where he had been volunteering over
the last couple months, but the nurses would let us off the floor.
He also managed a short trip with a walker to an nearby lobby area
where he and I sat over lunch.
I had some time to speak with one of his doctors late last night.
It is a blessing to me to hear the doctor speak well of my Dad's
volunteering at the hospital. My father's service to others has
always be a tremendous example to me. The doctor was also helpful
in giving some direction for the next steps our family will need
to take. There is not really a clear path, but we covet your
prayers as we think, discuss, and pray for the next best move in
this process. Hospitals are never very comfortable. Dad would like
to return home and we will be meeting with some groups that could
help us make that possible.
I am thankful for this special time that allows Dad and I to sit
together. Long moments of silence and special times to just be by
his side and pray. At times Dad can become agitated, confused, or
frustrated at his situation. These times can be hard especially
when we all want to help and Dad is used to serving others and
struggles to be served himself. Please pray for us as a family
that we would be able to exercise blessing to him and not become
hurt or frustrated when we fail to find the best ways to do it.
Once again. Thank you greatly for your prayers and to family, the
ZDL team, HBC friends, and some many others that support or family
in such wonderful ways.
With Hope in Him
Bob's son
我亲爱的朋友们
非常感谢你们的祷告！
我已经顺利回到美国。飞机在芝加哥因为需要检修稍稍耽搁了一下，后面行程很顺利，我到费城的时候是晚上11点，我刚好可以直接去医院看望爸
爸，和他待了一个多小时，然后回家。神真是恩待我。
最近这一两周爸爸特别感到气力衰微，他的腹部和肺部非常疼痛。除了慢性打嗝，医生给他服用的氯丙嗪和吗啡可以让他睡一会儿。他这样时睡时醒，
自己有时就有点糊涂，醒来时也仿佛在做梦一般，我现在就在医院，坐在他边上，利用他睡过去的片刻给你们写这封邮件。
今天爸爸的情况不错，能下床坐在轮椅上在地上来回走走。爸爸很想带我到医院的几个地方看看，过去几个月他曾在那些地方做过一些志愿服务的。护
士想让爸爸下地走走，爸爸也试着扶着助步架走了一段路到休息室，我们在那一起用了午餐。
我昨天很晚的时候和一位爸爸的负责医生谈了谈，我很有幸听得医生称赞父亲在医院做志愿服务。父亲甘心服侍他人从来都是我的一个美好榜样。医生
也为下一阶段我们家里如何配合给出了一些建议。前面的路怎样走还不是很清楚，我们会一起思考，商议，向神祈求一个最佳方案，也请求大家为我们
祷告。医院肯定是不舒服的，爸爸想回家，我们会再和一些相关人员谈谈，使这一想法成为现实。
我很感恩在这段特殊的时候能和爸爸在一起。很多时候我只是安静地坐在他身边，并为他祷告。有时爸爸会为他现在的状况感到烦躁、困惑和沮丧。这
时候我们都很想为他做些什么，但他一向服侍别人，现在却要接受别人照顾自己，所以心里会感到格外挣扎。也请为我们祷告，让我们全家人能为父亲
做些什么，同时当有时候我们达不到这样的效果时，也不致太难过和沮丧。
再一次诚挚感谢大家为我和家人献上的祷告。ZDL团队，HBC的朋友们和其他弟兄姊妹，谢谢你们以代祷为我和我的家人提供的最好支持。
----------------------
Update #2
Posted Sun, 05/17/2009
Dear All,
Thank you each and everyone for your love, caring words, and
prayers.
We did have the chance to meet with a gentleman from one of the
hospice groups in the area on Saturday. It was good to have mom
present as well as all the kids and John (Lisa's husband) and Kate
(Erik's wife). Both John and Kate have also walked this road with
their mothers, so their insight was a tremendous blessing to us.
Many questions got answered and we invited this gentleman to visit
with Dad on Sunday afternoon.
Dad was quite anxious to get home. Very tired of the hospital. And
those who know Dad will appreciate that after finding it would all
be covered under his insurance his mind was set at ease.
Over the weekend Dad received a blood transfusion to help boost
his blood count, which was quite low and carrying insufficient
oxygen. This did help some and his response to the question "Do
you feel better?" became "Well ... I feel different." He continued
to experience some ups and downs as they try to find the right
balance of pain medication vs. awareness/confusion. At some points
the pain accompanying the hiccups reaching '9' on the 10 point
scale.
Today (Monday) we again met with another hospice group with whom
we felt much more at ease. They are local, with a radius barely
extending beyond the 15 mile distance from the hospital. The
Social Services Representative is a graduate of the Christian
school where mom has taught and each of us children spent several
early education years. We counted this a rich blessing as with
Dad's main doctor being a strong Chinese Christian brother has
been. In the end we have decided to move forward with this hospice
group and direction here has really settled each of our hearts.
Dad's Doctor (Dr. Song) came back from being away over the
weekend. It is always strange to hold conversations about Dad in
Chinese, but Dad enjoys hearing us converse in Chinese, insisting
on this each time he visits (also both Mom and Dad struggle to
understand Dr. Song's accent). Although it usually results in one
or both us forgetting that we are speaking Chinese and sudden turn
to ask Mom or Dad a question which they are left wondering what in
the world we are talking about! Dr. Song confirmed we were making
the right decision about hospice, stating the timing was right.
This also added to a feeling of peace about the decision in one
aspect, but then brings home the reality of where we are.
Dad's final radiation treatment for the disease on his spine was
today. Praise the Lord that this has brought some relief to the
pain. Also it should relieve pressure on the spinal cord and avoid
paralysis.
This evening Mom and I returned home for a late dinner and began
moving furniture around to prepare for the delivery of the
hospital bed and such tomorrow morning. Assuming everything goes
as planned Dad should be able to come home tomorrow sometime. All
of us are looking forward to this. The hospital stay, trips, and
all have become a little tiring.
Thank you for your prayers. I also understand that some may be
made uncomfortable by these email updates. If you would prefer to
not receive these updates concerning my Dad. Please do not
hesitate to let me know if this is the case and I will remove you
from the list.
With Hope in Him,
Bob's son
弟兄姊妹，大家好，
谢谢大家，谢谢每一位的爱心，祷告和安慰的话语。
周六我们有机会和一个医疗康复机构的负责人见面谈谈，很好的是妈妈和家里的孩子以及儿媳Kate、女婿John也都去了，Kate和John
的妈妈都曾经历过医疗关怀机构的看护，他们的意见对我们非常有帮助。 很多问题都得到解答，我们邀请这位先生在周日去和父亲谈谈。
爸爸实在厌烦医院，很着急回家。了解爸爸的人知道，当爸爸知道他的医疗保险可以支付全部医疗费用时，他才放心了。
周末爸爸接受了输血，因为他血液里的血球数很低，含氧不足，输血可以提升这一水准。他输血后确实觉得好多了，当别人问他“感觉怎样?”的时候
他终于可以说：“感觉好些了！”
他的治疗方案为能减缓他的疼痛，同时又不至于让他过多昏睡和迷糊，所以用药种类和剂量的变化也让他的状况时好时坏，有时他的疼痛值会随着打嗝升至9（峰值是10）。
今天（周一）我们又约见了另外一家医疗关怀机构，这让我们更放心了。这家机构就在本社区，服务区域在医院周围方圆15英里。这家机构接待我们
的服务代表是从基督学校毕业的，让真让我们感恩！我妈妈曾在这所学校教书，我家每个孩子早年都在这所学校上过学。另外爸爸的一个主要负责医生
（宋医生）也是一个中国的基督徒弟兄。我们都感到这是神的恩典与赐福。最终我们决定由这家关怀机构接受爸爸的治疗，我们的心终于踏实下来。
宋医生周末后回到了医院。我们俩用中文交谈爸爸的病情，听上去有点怪怪的。但爸爸很高兴听我们用中文谈话，每次宋医生来的时候，他就坚持让我
们用中文谈（宋医生有口音，爸爸和妈妈听着也费劲）。有时候，我们俩说着说着就忘了，回过头来用中文问爸爸妈妈一两问题，常把他们搞得一头雾
水，无言以对！宋医生肯定了我们的选择关怀机构的时间和方案。这让我们心里对这一决定有了平安，但这也黯然提醒我们，爸爸已经快走到最后的时
刻。
今天要对爸爸的脊椎做最后治疗，感谢主，这会部分缓解他的疼痛，同时也减轻脊髓的压力，以避免瘫痪。
很晚我和妈妈回到家吃了晚饭，然后还是挪动家具，为明天早上从医院搬来的治疗床准备地方。这样如果没有什么意外，爸爸明天就可以从医院回家
了。这是我们每个人都盼望的。在医院监护、往返奔波以及其他的各样事情，确实是很累人的。
感谢你为我们付上的祷告。可能我这些消息会让你感到不太舒服，如果你不愿意收到关于我父亲的这些信息，请坦率告诉我，我会从邮件列表中去掉你
的名字。
在主里盼望！
Bob's son
-------------------------------------
Update #3
Posted Tue, 05/19/2009
It really is quite surreal to think this is really happening after
so many great months of strength and doing. Bob is home and that
is a good thing...the weather has been gorgeous, yet Bob has shown
no desire to go far from his bed. He sleeps much of the
time....but then again, he has asked for pain meds more than I've
anticipated. He is a good patient, not real demanding and
remembering his thank you's. We are so grateful for the support we
are receiving from so many...prayers, meals and encouraging
e-mails...YOU are the greatest!
Bob's wife
Dear All,
Thank you so much for the many emails filled with encouraging
words, poems, and prayers. It really was such a blessing!
We are home! Yesterday after several hours of paperwork, doctor's
visits, and final items my father was discharged from the hospital
to hospice at home.
There were some emotional points throughout the day. Once when one
of the medical professionals who my father has really appreciated
stopped by, I tried to wake up Dad calling, "Dad, Sherry is here
to say good-bye." Immediately I realized my mistake, but praise
the Lord for Sherry's warm and gentle heart. As Dad began to
become a little broken up, she sat on the edge of the bed and
talked with us for a bit, speaking words of strength and
encouragement to my father. There several moments like this as we
made our departure from the hospital. Dad lamented that he never
got to show me where and what he did during his days volunteering.
Also as we chatted with the aides and nurses and the understanding
that this part of the fight was coming to an end was difficult.
Arriving home, the hospital bed and other equipment was already in
place. The delivery men were kind and helpful. Later in the
afternoon, the hospice nurse arrived and helped us through the
process of getting in order all the various medications, timing,
and dosages. The are few words that really adequately describe
these moments that define a new reality for us, but I am amazingly
thankful to God for allowing me the chance to be here at this
time. To be able to be close to hold Mom and assist Dad in seeking
comfort from his pain is a gift from Him.
Thank you again for you prayers, kind words, and thoughts.
With Hope in Him,
Bob's son
亲爱的朋友们：
谢谢你们发来的这么多满载你们的诗歌、祷告和安慰话语的邮件，我收到了你们的丰盛祝福。
我们回家了。 昨天经过数小时的医生探视，以及办理手续，我父亲由医院被转移回家由医疗关怀机构看护。
一天来有很多时刻都深深触动我们。离开前我父亲很尊重的一位医学教授来探望他，我试着叫醒爸爸，告诉他Sherry来向他道别。但我立刻意识
到我犯了一个错误，因为我父亲在情绪上快要崩溃了。我为Sherry
教授的柔慈心肠感谢神，她坐在父亲的床边，和我们聊了一会儿，对父亲说了支持和鼓励的话。离别时充满了这样感动的时刻。父亲很伤感他一直不能带我到他做义工的地方看看他都
做了哪些志愿服务。我们和护工和护士谈了一会，他们让我们明白这场和病痛的战斗，在最后阶段是最艰难的。
到家了，医院的治疗床和其他设备已经都摆放好了。搬运工非常友善周到。下午关怀机构的护士到了，她们帮助我们把各样药物、用药时间，用药剂量
都了解了一下。几句话很难说清我们面对这一切时的心情。但我深深感谢神，我能够在这样的时刻和家人在一起。我能够拥抱妈妈，安慰爸爸缓解他的
疼痛。我为此感恩！
再一次感谢你们的代祷，以及恩慈的话语和安慰。
在主里盼望！
--------------------------
Update #4
Posted Sat, 05/23/2009
Saturday, May 23rd 2009
Yesterday, after work, Erik joined our team (for the weekend) to
help us walk day by day. I gave him my bed to better accommodate
his 6' 5' frame and the couch was my resting place. Although the
monitors give you a sense of what is happening, it was better to
be closer to the source of the sounds of Bob at night. Easier to
navigate from one room to the next rather than down the stairs in
the dark, with half awake brain. Perhaps this should be the
arrangement for now? Again, it's nice to have our family together
(well almost minus, the daughter-in-laws) Days are very different
in a sudden kind of way.and so are the nights...I prayed last
night that Bob would make his transition in the day. As Bob makes
his transition, trusting God. I too am making a transition ,
trusting the Lord all the way. Thank you for your prayers!
Bob's wife
Dear All,
Thank you to everyone for being so welcoming and encouraging of
these updates.
I was speaking with a dear brother yesterday on the phone who had
also walked this road with his father not long ago. He encouraged
me to write it all down. Good days and bad days. They are all
memories that it will be a wonderful treasure to look back upon in
the coming years, he shared. That word of encouragement and also
the requests by several you have provided me the motivation to
keep writing, even when it is easier to just want to sleep ;)
Since I last wrote there has been some good days and some bad
days.
Thursday was not such a good day. Dad was up frequently through
the night, as was Mom helping. He had a good amount of pain in the
morning and Dad requested some of what is called "breakthrough"
meds. This is an extra dose of morphine to help boost already
baseline pain medication. By mid-morning he was exhausted and
drifting in and out of sleep. Over lunch some friends from his
work stopped by and he was able to rally some, but after they left
he fell into a sleep that carried him through the evening. In the
evening he was frustrated by his lack of energy and inability to
stay awake. Feeling the burden we had some talks about not wanting
to go like this, such a burden. Also losing dignity in so many
ways has not been easy. I do praise the Lord for his provision for
me as I need to help Dad with so much of the personal care that is
part of this stage.
Friday was a good day! Although again in the morning Dad need a
breakthrough med, it was more to help with an aide that stopped by
to help bath him, rub lotion in his swollen and drying skin, and
give him a manicure! The nurse stopped by as well as two men from
Church, one who my father likes to affectionately call his
"half-brother." They had a wonderful visit. Later the Hospice
Chaplin stopped by and we had a great talk. Dad a normally quiet
person about issues of faith opened and shared his contemplations
about heaven, the bible, and life. He also was able to share his
heart about the mixture of hope and fear he had facing his own
death. My brother Erik arrived and we ate dinner, managed to get
Dad into a wheelchair for a walk around the block. His first time
out of the room since arriving home from the hospital. Though it
was painful on each small crack or bump, it was a lift to each of
us caring for Dad. Then us boys sat and watched youtube videos of
music from the 50-60's. I learned Dad really likes Ricky Nelson
and I never knew that. The highlight and difficult part for me
today was as we were working to maneuver Dad to the wheelchair and
down two small steps, Dad had is arm wrapped around my shoulders
and my arm around his waist and I felt the joy and pain of
supporting my father in his time of need. Pain to see this man who
was always so strong, always so capable, and always so independent
now so weak, so incapable, and so dependent. Joy to be his servant
and support.
This morning with the help of my brother-in-law we were able to
take another walk and even help Dad into a hammock outside in the
gentle spring breeze.
God is good and we are treasuring each day. I pray my attitude of
count each day blessing remains throughout my life no matter the
number of days.
Please pray as my sister will be baptized tomorrow around 11am.
Dad really would like to be there. We will do our best, but one
day at a time.
With Hope in Him
Bob's son
亲爱的朋友们， 2009－5－24
感谢大家，谢谢你们接纳和鼓励我发给你们这些关于父亲的邮件。
昨天我和一个很要好的弟兄在电话中聊了一下，他不久前也刚刚陪伴父亲走完最后一程。他鼓励我把这些都写下来。他说，许多年过后回头看看，无论
是顺心还是艰难，这些日子都将成为我们记忆中的珍宝。我也盼望从你们那里听得鼓励的话语，让我能坚持下来，要知道，有时我真想放弃去睡一会
儿。
自上一封邮件，又有一些好日子，坏日子随之而来。
周四就是不太好的一天。夜里爸爸起来很频繁，妈妈在一旁服侍他。到早上父亲已经痛得很厉害，他让给他吃一些叫“突破”的药，这是强效吗啡，在
常效止痛之外强化止痛效果。到中午他已经快耗尽了，人也是半梦半醒的。中午，他以前的同事来看他，他勉强打起精神，但人一走，他马上就睡过去
了，一直到晚上。醒来的时候他为自己气力衰竭，神志不清而感到很沮丧，觉得自己成为家人的很大负担，病痛让他很多方面都活得不像样儿了，而他
却无力改变。我真感谢神为我的预备，能让我在这个时候给与父亲很多的儿子的体贴和关爱。
周五是个好日子，尽管早上爸爸又服用了一剂“突破”，但我居然帮他洗了个澡，给他浮肿干燥的皮肤擦了护肤霜，而且还为他剪了趾甲！后来护士和
教会的两个弟兄来了。我父亲很动感情地称他们中的一个是“亲兄弟”。他们来了，父亲很高兴。父亲一般对信仰的话题谈的不是很多，但这次他很敞
开地分享了他对天堂、圣经、生命的想法，也谈到了他不得不面对死亡时恐惧与盼望交织的复杂感情。
我弟弟Erik来了，我们一起吃了饭，然后让父亲坐上轮椅，到外面走了走。这是他出院回家后第一次出门。尽管轮椅每次碰到小磕坎儿都会引起他
的剧烈疼痛，他能到外面来转转却让我们都有点振奋。回到家，我们兄弟几个一起看五六十年代的Youtube老音乐片，我第一次知道原来爸爸很
喜欢那个歌星尼尔森。今天有一件事让我感受很深，就是我要把爸爸挪到轮椅上去，然后下两节台阶。爸爸的胳膊绕在我的肩膀上，我搂住他的腰。在
他需要的时候我能够帮他，这让我心里又欢喜又心痛，让我痛苦的是一个曾经那么坚强，能干，独立的人现在却如此虚弱，无力，不得不依赖他人的帮
助。当我感到高兴的是，我能在他身边服侍他。
今天早上我和妹夫又一次带父亲出去走了走，甚至放了一把帆布椅，让父亲坐在上面，感受一下春天里的微风。
上帝是慈爱的，我们珍惜他所赐的每一天。我祈求神给我智慧，让我在今生的每一天都数算他的恩典，而不再计算生命的长短。
请大家为我们祷告，因为我妹妹明天上午11点要受洗，爸爸很想到场。我们会尽力，让一天的难处一天当。
在主里盼望！
------------------------------
Update #5
Posted Mon, 05/25/2009
Monday, May 25th 2009
Again, I'm including Rob's perspective below...
I have found myself thinking these days of the beginning of life's
journey when I spent many nights of interrupted sleep when our
children were babies. I've had "couch" duty this last week gladly,
giving the more lengthy beds in the house to two tall sons who
worked hard on a number of projects around the house. But more
importantly to the guys who assisted with adapting to "new" care
for Bob. I too feel confusion when rising from a sound sleep to
help with a variety of needs. PTL, for the most part, I've been
able to fall back to sleep after attempting to meet Bob's
requests. This is the hardest part for me, however, so this is
where I ask that you direct your prayers. Please pray I'll be
efficient and pleasant...doing all with a servant's heart, and
that major issues occur in the Light of day!
Bob's wife
Hello All,
Once again I would like to thank everyone for giving me this
outlet to share and travel this journey. I would like to state
again to anyone who may find my writings uncomfortable, I would be
happy to remove you from the list.
First, I would like to thank so many of you for praying about my
sister's baptism. At first it did not look like we would be able
to attend, but God was gracious. A little after 10am Dad decided
to give a go at trying to make it. Between Mom, my brother, and I
we were able to help Dad into a wheelchair, down some steps, and
out to the car. All of this took a bit longer than expected along
with trying to avoid bumps and potholes, but we arrived just in
time.
What a tremendous blessing to listen to my sister's testimony of
the rich heritage of faith in Dad and Mom that played such an
important part of her faith journey. God is good and we were able
to share many tears of joy surrounding Dad's wheelchair in the
back of the Church auditorium as Lisa entered the waters of
baptism, symbolizing her death to sin, being buried with Christ,
and then rising from the waters sharing in the victorious
resurrection of our Savior. The moment was ever more special as I
realized Dad may soon be absent from the body, but present with
the Lord.
Another beautiful moment was after the baptism, Dad request we
stay. The wheelchair despite being packed full of pillows and
towels was too uncomfortable. So we helped him lay across some
chairs in the back row. It was quite sweet for me to look upon my
father as he lean on Mom's bosom, sprawled across the chair,
wanting to share in worship with those of their Church Body. He
was not able to stay awake, but was determined to stay.
I would ask that you continue to pray for peace of mind and body
for Dad. These last few days he has increasing moments of
agitation and confusion. Mixing up thoughts and losing patience
when we do not understand. As you can imagine this is difficult
for all of us. When he has clarity again he apologizes and it
pains my heart to know he also realizes some of his confusion. I
can only imagine how this increaseshis frustration.
Also please pray as his strength and body becomes weaker. His legs
get shaker with each passing day. I am very thankful for my
brother-in-law who has also walked this journey with his mother
and with watching and listening to his instruction I am learning
better ways to lift and move my father in his weakened and painful
state.
Thank you again for your love and prayers. Though we strongly
desire to respond to your many emails and concerns, for now I
think it is best to communicate our gratitude and updates in the
manner. Thank you for your grace, and please know we are reading
and appreciate your notes of encouragement!!!
With Hope in Him
Bob's son
亲爱的朋友
感谢大家给我这样一个渠道，可以分享我的一路历程。我想再说一下，如果这些邮件让你不太舒服，请告诉我。
首先我要感谢你们大家为我妹妹受洗付上的祷告，一开始我们好像根本没法参加，但上帝有恩典的预备，10点刚过，爸爸就很想试着去参加，我、妈
妈和弟弟一起把父亲挪到轮椅中，下楼梯，进到汽车里，这费了很长时间，还要小心路上有颠簸，但我们最终准时到了。
妹妹的受洗见证对我真是一个巨大的祝福，妹妹见证了她从爸爸妈妈的信仰中承受了丰富的属灵祝福，爸爸妈妈是她信仰之旅中最重要的引导者。上帝
是慈爱的，我们在教堂的后面，围在爸爸轮椅的周围，为妹妹受洗流下欢喜快乐的泪水，她进入洗池，象征她与基督同死同埋葬，然后从水中站立起
来，象征与与救主一同复活。这个时刻我特别感动，也许爸爸的灵魂不久也要离开身体，去到与主同在的地方。
受洗后另一个美丽的时刻是，爸爸还想继续留下来。尽管轮椅里塞满枕头，毛巾被，但并不舒服。我们帮爸爸下来坐到教堂的后排，看着爸爸斜靠着坐
着，偎依在妈妈胸前，很想和他的教会肢体一起敬拜神，我心里充满了甜蜜的感动。他甚至神志有点不清楚，但他要留下来。
我请求大家继续为父亲的身心得平安祷告。最近几天他烦躁和糊涂的时候更多了，当我们不明白他说什么，就容易失去耐心地瞎猜。你知道这对我们真
是太难了。等爸爸清醒一点时，他就会向我们道歉，他其实也意识到他糊涂了，我们看着觉得心痛，也能想象这让爸爸感到多么沮丧。
爸爸的身体气力都越来越衰弱，他的腿比以前抖得更厉害了。幸好我的妹夫也曾陪他的妈妈走过生命最后一程，我照着他说的去挪动或给他翻身，好让
爸爸在这么衰弱和疼痛的时候少受点罪。
再一次感谢你们的爱和祷告，我非常渴望回复你们的邮件和关爱，但此时可能我在这里通报情况和表达我们的感谢，谢谢你们的恩慈，要知道我们一直
在读你们充满鼓励的话语。
在主里盼望！
--------------------------
Update #6
Posted Fri, 05/29/2009
Friday, May 29th 2009
I open my computer and find Rob has written another update.
Although documenting has been such an intregal part of my Creative
Memories' business for so long, I find myself slipping behind his
lead. Each day whizzes by as you'll see if you keep reading to a
"typical" day. So acknowledging that, I'll take time to say thank
you from ME. I've always been a huge advocate of written formal
thank you's...I valued being personal...everyone needs to be
appreciated individually! BUT I've really gotten behind...please
know how much all your efforts are meaning to me.. There is
nothing to prepare a person for the activity we experienced these
last weeks and I agree with Rob in the new sensitivity we have for
others facing the same or similar.Just one more way God instills
compassion in us along the way.
Rob has captured so well the Bob of today, so quickly changing. He
sleeps so much...we wait for the moments to talk and then hope he
is understanding...his responses are often confused. Well, I'll
let you read on if you'd like. Please pray for Bob's comfort and
an ear inclined to his Saviour and for all of us and you standing
beside him in his journey! Thank you so much!
Bob's wife
Dear All,
Thank you again to all those who have been praying, send notes,
cards, emails, and meals to support our family during this time.
We are often overwhelmed with the rich support of the Body of
Christ, friends, and family during this time.
I would like to begin by asking forgiveness from any of you out on
this list who may have already or are currently walking the road
of being a caregiver for a loved on in the home. Please forgive me
for not realizing all that is needed to walk this part of the
journey. I am so thankful that the Lord has given me these days to
understand and I hope it forever changes the ways I pray and
support others in a similar path.
Dad's confusion seems to be increasing in recent days. This has
sharpened our focus to grasp hold of those moments when Dad has
clarity and be available to talk. I would appreciate your prayers
to best
respond to the comments that make little sense to us. This morning
Dad turns to me and says "What is Uncle Sam so hot about?" After a
brief pause to see if he was really wanting an answer I responded
that Uncle Sam has lots to be hot about. Then Dad became upset and
it seemed he was trying to communicate about a person in
particular not the Nation. These kind of moments are increasingly
frequent and agitating to Dad.
Both Mom and I have also had sweet moments with Dad as well.
Massaging Dad's feet the yesterday we had just a gentle
conversation about a thing like the foot massage that were
actually comforting in these days of discomfort, agitation, and
pain. Mom later was able to hold his hand and speak with him of
things of the heart. Then later I was able to assure Dad of his
biggest concern that we would take care of Mom and his home.
Dad has also continued to weaken physically. Prior he was able to
manage with assistance to sit up, swing off the bed, stand, and
then sit on a portable commode. Over the last couple days, that
has digressed to me lifting more and more of his weight to where
now he is almost dead weight. Yesterday he was not even sure he
wanted or could get out of the bed. It is another step we know,
that does not make it easier.
I would like to ask you all to pray as I will need to return to
China in a week. This a very real reality for Mom and I. We have
been working to line up volunteers who will be available to help,
routines that will allow he to serve Dad without lots of lifting,
and understand the full services hospice can offer.
Thank you again for the prayers for Kay and the kids. She is
indeed my SUPERWOMAN!
With Hope in Him
Bob's son
Below is a description of our daily routine if any are interested.
I decided to record it more for memory for the future:
Life has fallen into a bit of a routine for Mom and I. Usually it
begins around 12-1am when Dad first wakes up after all of us
turning in. Mom has been responding to this first call faithfully,
which is
good because it seems Dad's call for help does not seem to awaken
me! After providing some assistance Dad is able to sleep some more
until about 3-3:30am when again he is unable to sleep and will
turn on the TV or need further assistance.
Then about 6am or so we get started with the day. The typical
routines of the morning for each of us, like visits to the
bathroom and such, take more effort in Dad's weaken condition. The
last couple days even getting out of the bed has become too
difficult and we are discovering new ways to help here. Then it is
on to the morning regimen of meds and trying to find something
that Dad can find remotely appetizing for breakfast. Being
bedridden is quite uncomfortable and helping Dad shift frequently
is important and always a bit of a circus. It is important to find
a way to lift or shift him without causing too much pain.
Usually we help Dad shift a couple times each hour. Morning
usually has a visit from a nurse to check Dad's vitals, an aide to
help bathe, or visiting friend(s). Teeth brushing and shaving take
more effort and time then before, thus becoming events in
themselves. Spare moments are filled with extra laundry,
sanitizing, or quick nap to catch up from the night before.
Lunch seems to arrive quickly and we all brainstorm together to
find something Dad can be enticed enough by to take more than a
bite or two. It is a good appreciate all the blessings of food Dad
has come to love over his 60 years, although not much of it is
appealing anymore. Our afternoons are much like the morning in
shifting positions, laundry, chores and some days visitors.
Sometimes I am able to squeeze in a little work for ZDL, but not
too much. If an errand needs to be run (new meds, supplies or
picking up my nephew from the local elementry school) we usually
can get to it in the afternoon.
Dinner, seems later and later (as Dad has been pointing out) as we
get slower on the various things as the day progresses. We gather
together holding hands to pray over our meal and thanks for
another day together is often the theme. This part of the evening
is often when Dad is at his best! Staying awake for 15-20 minutes
at a time. We have watched movies together, listen to oldies
music, or just sat together. This seems to be a special window
that God has given us when things are most clear. Thank you, Lord.
Mom tries to get in bed a little earlier at 10-10:30pm, while I
stay up usually to 11:30 or 12am to help Dad with the last affairs
of the evening. I look forward to this time as it seems special as
well. Turning down all the lights and one last kiss on Dad's bald
head before turning in. It is in these moments that God again
gives me a gratefulheart for His provision to allow me to be here
now.
-----------------------------
Updates #7abc
Posted Tues, 06/02/2009
Tuesday, June 02nd 2009
Dear All,
Thank you again for the continued outpouring of support for our
family. Also thanks to the many who in contacting us mentioned how
these updates are helping to guide your prayers. This is a great
encouragement to our family.
It looks like I am about four days behind in updating this written
record, so it might just be some of the memorable items that make
it in here. I may just start typing ... and I am afraid it might
get long,
don't worry if it is too much to read, do not feel obligated to
read it all!
Last week ended with Dad clearly determined to make contact with
his siblings. Though it took a few cycles of drifting in and out
of sleep to make clear his desire to connect with them, his was
able to speak with his brothers on Thursday and Friday.
Interestingly Dad was adamant that I photograph him speaking on
the phone with them. We also took some video during their
conversation. Dad's passion that his joy be theirs was evident as
he was clear in reminding them of God and His importance in their
lives. What a blessing to be invited to capture these moments.
These days also held special moments for Mom and Dad, when pain
was too much for Dad and required an extra dose of morphine. It
has been a special comfort to Dad to have Mom at his side.
Sometimes these sweet moments come at 4am when it is just good to
hold the hand of your wife
of over 37 years. And Dad is very aware when Mom is away, asking
for her frequently when she runs to the store or even at 6 am when
I have sent Mom back to bed and Dad wants me to bring the phone so
he can call her at work. It is a treasure to my heart to see how
much Mom means to Dad.
Speaking of treasure, it has also been great to see how much Dad
misses Erik my brother as well. All through the week Dad will ask,
"Where is Erik?" When I inform him he is at work/home (about an
hour and half away), Dad first thinks for a moment and I can see
how he misses him and quickly follow up, "but he will be here on
Friday!" to which Dad settles back into his pillows with a sigh of
relief and "that's good." Erik arrived on Friday. Dad always seems
to rally some at his arrival. Eating a little more dinner and
staying awake more. I feel a little guilty because Mom and I have
projects to complete when he is here! Erik (and his wife Kate)
have been a great relief giving Mom and I have a chance to run
errands or get some exercise.
Erik and I embarked on another emotionally difficult journey on
Saturday. Last week we had built shelves in our shed in
preparation to house the tools from Dad's truck. Then on Saturday
we moved over 20 years of tools and supplies from my father's
famous red work van to the shed for storage. Dad insisted on being
turned to keep a careful eye on us. I was glad to have Erik there.
As we went through the many tools of my father's skill hands I was
reminded of the master craftsman that
he is. Also at one point I came across several books containing
the records of people he had done work for, page after page of
different people with many just charged little beyond supplies.
Dad loved serving others with the gifting God had given him.
Emptying that truck was emotionally draining for Erik and I, but I
cannot begin to imagine what it was like for Dad (though it has
been one of his forefront desires to see it handled).
On Sunday I enlisted Erik to wake up at 4:30am to travel up to NYC
to share in a fellowship there. It was great to share this
experience with him. Also it was a great lift to us both to
worship and share with this dynamic fellowship in the middle of
Chinatown. We both were blessed by the Body of believers there as
they even had Dad's name in the bulletin and reminded the
congregation to be lifting up him and our family. Our bus got
trapped in Chinatown traffic leaving and it was 7pm before we
arrived back at the house. God's timing is perfect and we walked
in the door with precise timing. Sunday was a flurry of visitors
to the home and while encouraged Mom and Erik's wife were clearly
in need of a break!
We sent Mom off to bed early and the I slept on the floor to be
ready to help Dad through the night. It was night of crazy
requests that come from the confusion of morphine dreams and pain.
His left foot had now swollen with skin stretched tight and toes
turning purple. Tired as I was I think I will remember fondly the
2am foot massage in the quiet of the night with Dad as he was able
to register some relief and fall back asleep. But at 4am and again
6am he insisted we try new measures to
relieve the pain, some I had to deny as they we unpractical and
unsafe and really more the confusion for the drugs speaking, but I
did help him shift from the hospital bed to couch. This was a
reminder of his diminishing strength as my muscles (yes, I know my
muscles are rather small) strain harder as he is able to offer
less and less assistance. Yet this change of position was a relief
that afforded him rest until
the nurse's arrival later that morning.
Lisa, my sister, has also been often on Dad's mind. He is careful
to shield her from some of the more undignifying necessities of
his current state. It is obvious he still seeks to protect his
princess, who he
loves so much. He is concern for her and her family's well-being
as he is always making sure that she is taking good care of them.
Seeing his daughter and her family well provided for has been a
great comfort to Dad.
Well, I put Dad to bed about an hour ago. And have been back
several times through the course of typing this. He it looks like
it might be a restless night. I better get some sleep while I can.
Thank you so much for your prayers. If you have made it this far
in the email, please allow me to share that while these updates
seem to be getting longer, they really have become a way for me to
capture these waning days with Dad. Thank you for being a part of
this process. It is a blessing to have you to share it with!
With Hope in Him
Bob's son
亲爱的朋友们
再次感谢你们一直以来对我们一家人的支持，也谢谢一些朋友的鼓励，他们提到这些邮件让他们知道怎样更好地为我们一家祷告。这对我们全家是一个
很大的激励。
从上次的邮件我有4天没有记什么了，所以我在这写一下记忆中的事情，好，我现在就开始写，恐怕有点长……，如果太长，也不用担心，也别勉强自
己去读。
上周末，爸爸表示他想见他的兄弟们，尽管他时梦时醒，我们着实费了一点劲才弄明白他的意思。周四和周五爸爸终于和他的兄弟们通了电话，爸爸很
固执地让我们在他打电话的时候给他拍了几张相片，我们也给他摄了像。父亲这样做是想和他的弟兄们分享他的喜乐，特别是他想让他的弟兄们知道，
当他嘱咐他们在生活中要尊崇上帝的时候，他的神志是清醒的。看到父亲这样做并为他记录下这样的时刻，我觉得很蒙受祝福！
这几天，父亲有时候疼得太厉害了，不得不服用强效吗啡，这对爸爸妈妈都是难熬的时刻。对爸爸来说，有妈妈坐在他身边，他就会感到舒服很多，往
往下午
4点以后是一个安静舒心的时间，在这黄昏时分父亲会拉起他的37年结发妻子的手。妈妈一离开，父亲似乎马上就知道，当妈妈跑着去买东西，或我让妈妈上床休息时，爸爸总是找
妈妈，甚至他让把电话拿给他，他要给妈妈工作的地方打电话。看到妈妈在父亲心中这么重要，我心里感到非常满足和欣慰。
另外一个珍贵记忆是看到爸爸特别想念我的弟弟Erik。一周来，父亲总是在问：Erik哪去了？我告诉他Erik上班了或者回家了（1.5小
时车程），爸爸就不说话了，我知道他想Erik了，就赶快说，他周五来！爸爸听了就缩回到枕头里，叹口气说，“那太好了。”周五Erik来
了，父亲就显得比平时精神一点，饭也吃的多一点，醒着的时候也比平时长。让我有点愧疚的是，Erik
一来就特别忙，我和妈妈好像有好多事要办，他和他的妻子Kate大大缓解了我和妈妈的压力，让我们有时间干点别的事，或者出去活动活动。
周六我和Erik又完成了一件让我们都很伤感的事。上周我们已经在储存间架起隔板来，周六我们兄弟俩从父亲那辆有名的红色工作旅行车上，把父
亲20 多年来所用的手工工具都搬到储存间里了，父亲让人帮他仰起身来，好看着我们搬。我很高兴
Erik和我一起干，搬的过程中我再一次感慨父亲真是一个能干的巧匠，我翻到好几本父亲的工作帐目记录，客户不同，但每一笔活儿几乎都是在成本上只加收很少的钱，父亲乐于
用上帝给他的恩赐去为别人服务。随着我们逐渐清空这个车子，我和Erik在情感上都像被掏空了一样，我也能想象父亲看着这个过程心里会是什么
滋味（尽管他坚持要看着我们干）。
周六早上4：30，我就把Erik
叫起来了，我们一起去新泽西去参加一个团契聚会。我和Erik一起去真是太好了，我们兄弟俩在这个位于中国城中部的生机勃勃的团契里一起敬拜和分享，让我们都很振奋。我们
在这里蒙受了主内肢体的祝福，他们甚至把父亲的名字记在每日祷告的目录上，好让大家为父亲和我们一家祷告。
回来的路上，车子堵在中国城，到晚上7点我们才到家。上帝的时间从不错误，我们在最需要的时刻到家了。周日一拨接一拨儿的人来家里看望父亲，
这让妈妈和弟妹很受鼓励，但我们进家的那一刻，她们已经着实累坏了。
我早早让妈妈上床休息了。我在父亲床边打了地铺，准备奋战一夜了。这一夜父亲因为疼痛和强效吗啡引起的梦寐，整夜不停地叫人。他的左脚已经肿
得发亮，脚趾头都紫了。尽管我那天特别累，但我很高兴我还记得2点的时候给他做足部按摩，这样他还可以减轻一点疼痛，多睡一会儿。但到4点和
6点的时候父亲一定要服用一种新止痛剂，但这是一种新药缺少临床，也不安全，吃了会更糊涂和说胡话。但我把爸爸从床上挪到躺椅上了。这个过程
中我发现父亲自己的力气越来越小了，我的肌肉特别吃紧，因为父亲自己一点都用不上劲了。
还好，换了位置让他疼痛减轻了不少，这让他能休息到第二天早上，直到护士来了。
父亲也总是想着我的姐姐，Lisa，但当着姐姐的面，他总是回避不提那些类似大小便这样的尴尬要求，很明显他爱姐姐，即使病成这样也想着要保
护他的公主。他特别牵挂她和她一家过的好不好，他一定要知道她已经把她的家照管好了才放心。看到她一家人都平安健康让父亲心里很得安慰。
一小时前我把父亲挪到床上，写这封信我往返了好几趟，才断续写完。看来这一夜是不能休息了，我最好尽可能地睡一小会儿。感谢你的祷告，如果你
已经读到此处，请原谅这封邮件似乎有点长了，但对我来说，这已经成为帮助我抓住爸爸最后一点时光的方式。谢谢你陪我走过，你的同在是我的祝
福！
在主里盼望！
Bob's son
-------------------------
Update #8
Posted Fri, 06/05/2009
Friday, June 05th 2009
This is the afternoon after a challenging night! Most everyone is
asleep right now to catch up on what was lost last night. I forgot
to take my lunch time anti-biotic and so am upright...no more acid
reflux or fainting for me!!
As challenging as the agitation of yesterday and evening were,
there were tender moments as our family worked together supporting
Bob and each other. We even laughed together at some of the
comments Bob was pulling from his memory (like "that poor cat in
the hat!") It's been a treasured day of being with one another,
working for the common goal of comfort and pressing on toward the
transition ahead. We continue to appreciate you for your prayers
and blessings. I join Rob in saying Thank you, Thank you, Thank
you!
Bob's wife
Dear All,
Thank you for all of the kind responses to the last string of 7abc
updates. I do apologize that I have not been able to respond to
some of the questions personally. We are GREATLY blessed by your
notes. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Yesterday it seems that we crossed another threshold in this
journey. The nurse visited in the morning and left shortly before
10am. I took leave for some time to have a celebratory lunch with
my Mother-in-law for her birthday. Upon my return Mom was by Dad's
bedside and he was in an agitated state. He was squirming and
mumbling pretty much non-stop. It was obvious that he was trying
to communicate and desired a response. Most of his speech was
unintelligible or when we could understand, things spoken made
little logical sense to us. Mom mentioned that this had been his
condition pretty much since I left.
Dad continued in this agitated state through the afternoon and
evening, not resting or sleeping. Lisa (my sister) arrived from
work and I contacted my brother, Erik to updated him on the
situation. Mom took a break to participate in the graduation
program for the children at her work. This was really good for her
and I believe gave some of the energy that was needed for night
ahead of us. Dad was still agitated and even medicines designed to
calm and relieve pain seemed to have little impact.
Erik also joined us and it was a blessing to gather around Dad,
holding his hands and letting him know we were all there. We had a
chance to communicate again our love for him and that we were
ready whenever he was. God is so good to give our family this
special privilege and we are truly grateful.
The night continued and around 1am we gathered together blankets
and pillows and made camp around Dad. Dad's agitation was intense
enough that he would work himself to a point of sliding out of the
bed every 10-20 minutes and we would help him re-adjust and get
re-positioned. Around 2am I was too exhausted and turned in to get
a couple hours of rest. Erik continued until about 3am, when Mom
took back over. By 6am Dad still could not settle and after a call
into the Hospice Care, some advice, and care he was finally able
to settle some.
The nurse was by this morning and as all the doctors and nurses
along the way, she commented at how strong Dad is. He heart
remains steady, along with blood pressure and oxygen levels. He is
a fighter and God has blessed him with a strong core.
Thank you for your continued prayers. I have been in touch with my
airline and will seek to make a decision in the morning. I am
thankful that we are all together as a family during this time. We
thank you for your prayers for strength, stamina, discernment, and
wisdom during these days.
With Hope,
Bob's son
谢谢大家在我的7a-b-c邮件后发来的问候。我很抱歉不能一一回复大家的问题，但我真的感谢你们的来信，谢谢你们，谢谢你们，谢谢你们！
昨天我们好像又经历了一次这条路程上的险境。护士早上来了，但很快10之前就走了。我抽身离开了一会儿去参加我岳母的生日庆祝午餐。回来的时
候，妈妈正在爸爸身旁，爸爸处在一种焦躁不安的状态，他不停地扭动，口中不停地咕哝着什么，很明显他想说些什么，并且盼望得到回应。但他的大
多数话我们都不明白，或者我们听清了也觉得所说的事情都不着边际。妈妈说从我早上离开爸爸就一直这样。
爸爸这种焦躁不安一直持续整个下午直到晚上，不停歇也不睡觉。姐姐（Lisa）下班后到了，我也联系我的弟弟Erik，告诉他父亲的情况。妈
妈离开一会儿，去学校参加了她教的孩子们的毕业活动。这对妈妈很有帮助，可以让她恢复一下精力来应付下面一夜的陪护。父亲还是很焦躁，服用了
镇定药和止痛药也不管用。
Erik也来了，很感恩我们一家人能聚在父亲床前，拉着父亲的手，让他知道我们都在他身边。天父如此慈爱，让我们有这样的殊荣，一家人能在父
亲临终前围坐在一起，再一次告诉父亲我们爱他，也为他离去做好准备。我真为这样情景深深感恩。
夜深了，到凌晨1点，我们各自拿着毯子和枕头就在父亲周围扎营了。父亲特别焦躁、折腾，以至每10来分钟就能把自己从床上滑脱下来，我们就再
把他放回去，安顿好。大约2点左右，我累极了，就去睡了一两个小时，Erik一直坚持到3点，然后妈妈来接替他。一直到早上6点父亲都没有平
静下来，我们给临终关怀机构打电话，他们给了一些建议和嘱咐，父亲最终安稳一些了。
今天早上护士来了，其他医生护士也来了。
她说了一下父亲目前的状况，他心脏正常，血压血氧也还稳定。父亲是一名战士，上帝赐福给他坚强的生命。谢谢你们一直以来的持续代祷，我已经联系航空公司明天早上再做延期的
决定。我为我们一家人这个时候能聚在一起而感恩！感谢你的代祷让我们能有力量、坚韧、辨察和智慧渡过这些日子！ 谢谢你们！
主里盼望！
-----------------------------
Update #9
Posted Sat, 06/06/2009
Saturday, June 06th 2009
It was good to see the sun re-appear today...fresh air and bright
light brighten the day...how like the Son who gives us Hope! Much
of our activity with Bob is in the dark which makes our day's
activity one of catch-up and napping. This is such an exhausting
encounter...how we appreciate your prayers for strength!
Bob's wife
Dear All,
Just wanted to briefly give you all an update.
Last night was another opportunity for us as a family to shower
our love upon Dad. Despite not drinking his body is still readily
relieving considerable amounts of fluids. And despite our best
attempts to capture these fluids cleanly, the speed and urgency of
their need to release came upon us to quickly. Thus through the
night we helped Dad get cleaned and changed various sheets and
padding every hour or two. When the nurse arrived this morning she
inserted a catheter to give Dad (and us) the ability to relieve
his discomfort in a more manageable way.
The activities of the night also help confirm another decision
that Kay and I had made last night. I did change my flight/travel
plans from today, the 6th to Friday, the 19th. It was in fact the
only date that was available on my ticket class without having to
reissue the ticket and pay nearly the cost of another ticket. We
believe this was the best thing to do. Thank you for so many that
prayed as we made this difficult decision. We would ask that you
continue to pray for Kay and the kids in China and that upon my
return on the 20th that the process of our family's visa would go
smoothly as it will leave just a few short days to do that
processing.
The nurse also checked dad's vitals this morning. His blood
pressure and oxygen levels have begun to decrease and his
temperature is beginning to rise. This is part of the process and
we are seeking to be a blessing to him in the coming time.
Thank you again for your prayers and thoughts for our family.
With Hope
Bob's son
亲爱的朋友，
我在这简短地向大家报告一下父亲的情况。
昨天晚上又有一次机会，让我们全家能够再次向父亲倾注我们的爱。现在父亲已经不喝水了，但他身体上还是持续地渗出大量液体，我们努力想随时擦
干，但体液渗出似乎又快又急，让我们有点措不及防。一整夜，我们尽力让父亲身上保持干爽，床单和衬垫换了一条又一条，差不多一小时一换。直到
早上护士来了，她给父亲插了一条导尿管（也是为我们），这样就有效地减轻了父亲的不适。
这一夜的奋战也让我更坚定了我和Kay昨晚作出的一个决定。我把回程机票从6号改到了19日，这也是我的机票等级唯一能选择的日期，否则就再
花差不多一张机票的价钱重新出票。我们相信19号是最好的选择了。谢谢你们大家为我们做这个艰难的决定所付上的祷告。我们请求大家为了在中国
的Kay和三个孩子祷告，还有我们全家的中国签证（续签）通过祷告，因为等我回去的时候，离最后办理的期限就剩几天了。
今天早上护士为父亲做了一些关键性的检查，他的血压和血氧都开始下降，体温在持续升高，这是人（衰竭）的一个过程现象。
再次感谢大家的祷告和对我们的挂念。
盼望！
Bob's son
-----------------------------
Update #10
Posted Sun, 06/07/2009
Sunday, June 07th 2009
This room Bob built is such a pleasant spot, so sunny, so airy and
today we lifted the windows allowing us to hear the birds more
clearly (Dad always said birds reminded him of God singing to us)
We treasure the interlude we had with Bob today, when he seemed
somewhat alert! Visually, Bob’s body is obviously deteriorating
and we are being prepared for rejoicing when we know he is free
and whole.
Today, I opened my Bible and started reading “just where I
stopped” And this is what It said, “For He rescued us from the
dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son He
loves in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.”
Colossians 1.13.
Bob's wife
Dear All,
Dad has slept most of the last two days. Last night around 8pm or
so his breathing more labored, laden with fluid. Again all of us
were present to sit by Dad's side. After a few hours his breathing
eased again and Erik and I slept downstairs with him, while Lisa
and Mom were able to get some rest in the beds upstairs.
Dad rested through the morning and then around 12pm this afternoon
he woke up. This was a very special time for us. Dad was aware,
looking at each on of us. We each communicated our love for him
and excitement for the glory of God's presence Dad was soon to
experience. Dad mumbled a few things and seemed to motion for a
pen, but was unable to use it. He did respond to some of questions
by widening his eyes or squeezing our hands. What a gracious
comfort from God to give us this knowledge of his understanding
our communication.
Then around 2pm Dad drifted back into a sleeping state. We are
taking turns by his side as he will open his eyes every once and a
while and look at us. His temperature continues to rise and I just
used a wash cloth to towel off the sweat and oils. I was talking
to him as I wiped, "Dad, I am just using a washcloth, it should
feel a little better." To which he clearly frumpled his brow. So I
said, "Oh, you can hear me can't you ..." to which he gave me a
nice half smile.
We are grateful and a yet a little jealous, the praise music
playing in the background here reminds us of the AWESOME joy so
near before Dad. He is a blessed man, a child of the King!
With Hope and Joy for Dad,
Bob's son
亲爱的朋友们，
我父亲这两天差不多一直在昏睡，昨天晚上8点他的呼吸变得更吃力了，不停地出汗。我们全家再一次围坐在父亲身边，过了几个小时他的呼吸平稳下
来，我让妈妈和姐姐上楼到床上去睡，我Erik就留在楼下陪父亲。
上午父亲一直睡着，到中午12点的时候他醒来了，这对我们是非常难得的时间，父亲这时候是明白的，他看着我们大家，我们每个人都告诉父亲，我
们爱他，为他很快就会进入父神的荣耀之中而激动。父亲口中喃喃地说了什么，他似乎想用钢笔写点什么，但已经写不动了。我们问的一些问题，他就
用睁大眼睛或是捏捏我们的手来回答。感谢神安慰我们，让我们知道父亲已经明白了我们向他表达的爱。
大约下午2点，父亲又一次昏睡过去，我们在他身边说话，他很偶尔地会睁开眼，看着我们大家。他的体温持续升高，我用一条湿毛巾给
他擦去脸上的汗和油，我告诉他，“爸爸，我用湿毛巾给你擦擦，这样你会舒服一点……”这时，我清楚地看见他皱了皱眉，我就说“哦，爸爸，你听
见了，对吗？”爸爸脸上就露出了一丝微笑。
赞美的音乐在屋子里萦绕，似乎是在提醒我们，那极大无比的喜乐就在眼前了。我们心里充满了感恩，甚至是有一点羡慕。父亲是一个蒙受祝福的人，
他是神的孩子。
为父亲充满喜乐和盼望！
--------------------------
Great is Thy Faithfulness
Posted Sun, 06/07/2009
Dear All,
For several days now I knew that I would be writing this email.
This fact makes it no less surreal.
There are many things that I could share with you about my
Father's last moments on this earth. I pray that what I do share
will communicate the love of Christ and His comforting arms around
our family.
Perhaps for now I will just share some small items.
Tonight we had Dad's favorite meal, steak on the grill and corn on
the cob. While we ate we gathered around him and explained that we
were having the meal in honor of him. As the night went on his
breathing became less labored and more gentle. I watered Dad's
garden, refilled his bird feeders, and cleaned the filters in his
beloved fish pond. Coming back in, I let Dad know what I finished
and he began to have some spacing in his breathing.
I have alarms set on my phone to remind me of my appointments
throughout the day. At 8:35 my alarm went off to inform me that
morning devotions of the Project team at ZDL would be beginning in
10 minutes. Mom asked, "What is that bell?" I explained and she
remembered her morning devotions. "It just so happened to be the
verses I would pray for Dad all the time, Colossians 1:10-12," Mom
started. "Then I looked under those verses and the next verses
were perfect for Dad today!" she
continued. Grabbing her Bible and readying to share, Dad took a
longer pause in his breathing.
We shifted closer to Dad. Mom started singing the song Dad wanted
at his funeral "Great is Thy Faithfulness" and we made it through
the first verse into the second. While humming into the second (we
were forgetting some of the words) Dad peacefully took his last
breath. It was beautiful and amazing. The Bible teaches to be
absent from the body is to be present with the Lord (2 Corinthians
5:8). We had watched Dad make that transition and it was stunning.
God is so good.
In closing I wanted to share those final verses that Mom was about
to share with us, I can not think of more comforting and
remarkable words on this special night. Colossians 1:13-14 "For He
(God) has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us
into the kingdom of the Son (Jesus) He loves, in whom we have
redemption, the forgiveness of sins."
My Dad is experiencing His hope and joy right now ... I am a
little jealous, Dad!
Bob's son
神的信实广大 2009-6-8 中午12:10
亲爱的朋友们，
很多天以来，我知道我迟早要写今天这样一封信，但当此刻我落笔来写的时候，仍有恍若隔世的感觉。
父亲在世的最后几个月，很多事我都想和大家分享。我在祷告中祈求，愿我的分享让大家看到基督的爱，看到他安慰的膀臂一直围绕着我们一家。
我在这里只分享几件小事。
昨天晚上，我们做了父亲最爱吃的烤肉和烤玉米棒，我们一家人围着他坐着，告诉父亲是为尊荣他而做的晚餐。随着夜深了，父亲的呼吸越来越吃力也
越来越微弱。我去浇了父亲的花园，喂了他养的鸟，又清洗了金鱼缸里的过滤器，当我回来告诉爸爸我为他做的，他的呼吸就不那么急促了。
我在手机设了响铃，好提醒我一天要做的事儿。8:35我的手机响了，这提醒我ZDL项目部过10分钟要开始灵修了。妈妈问我谁的电话，我告诉
她，妈妈想起了她的晨更灵修。妈妈说：“我灵修经文今天刚好到歌罗西书1章10-12节
，这是我一直为你们的父亲祷告的经文。然后我就看到随后的两节经文，于你们父亲今天是最合适的。”她拿起圣经要和大家一起分享，这时父亲急促的呼吸就开始和缓下来。
我们都靠近父亲坐下来，妈妈开始唱那首“神的信实广大”，是父亲嘱咐在他的追思礼拜上唱的。当我们唱完第一段，轻声哼唱要进入第二段的那一
刻，父亲安静地停止了呼吸。这真是充满恩典的美好一刻。圣经教导说，我们坦然无惧，是更愿离开身体与主同住。我们亲眼看到了父亲离世见主的这
奇妙一刻，神真是慈爱。
最后，我还想和大家分享妈妈提到的那随后的两节经文，在这个父亲离去的夜晚，再没有别这两节经文更能带给我们安慰的了。歌罗西书1章
13-14节 “他救了我们脱离黑暗的权势，把我们迁到他爱子的国度里，我们在爱子里得蒙救赎，罪过得以赦免。”
此刻，我的父亲正在感受从神来的喜乐与盼望…… 我真的有点羡慕你，爸爸！